Goodbye 2011 - Hello 2012

This morning, as I was lying in bed wondering if everyday of my 49th year was going to feel like a hangover, I reflected on the past year and started thinking about the year to come. One nice thing about having a birthday at the butt end of the year is that the retrospective holiday special includes all twelve of the previous months.

2011 was a year of travel beginning with our yearly Caribbean cruise in February with John and Jay from Fort Lauderdale, as well as with friends from Chicago, Germany, England, and other far-flung parts of the world. The ports were pretty boring in themselves this time out, but we kept busy with massages, excursions (ATV tour, zip lines, and Mayan ruins), parties, dinners, and trips to the shipboard clinic for John's crushed finger. This was followed by a trip to Chicago over Memorial day, an unexpected trip to Asia to visit the branch of the family taking root on the other side of the world, and a Thanksgiving excursion to visit John and Jay.

2011 was also a year of huge work projects as well as several large organizational changes that have left me feeling a bit rudderless. I was chatting with Alex last night and told him changes with my job were slowly sucking away my mojo - of course that comment could also be due to the end of the year blues, the slow progression of the years, or the gathering gravitational force of my sofa. Nonetheless, besides the several end of year trips I have taken, I have been quite the homebody over the past six months - early to bed, early to rise, and mostly hangover-free....

At Christmas dinner, my dear friend Clodagh asked everyone at the table about their new year resolutions. Since I had not started thinking of them as yet, I came up with the boring response of working to be more frugal while still maintaining my semi-fabulous lifestyle - hence my frenzy of retail therapy to close out 2011 - a boy has to shop after all!

This morning, between the pulsation of PBR-induced head pains, I conducted a more thorough inventory of the things I would like to work on in the coming year.

1. Break out of my comfort level and take more risks (career choices, relationships, spiritually)
2. Pay off my car by July (two years early) and increase my emergency fund by $5000
3. Have no credit card debt at the end of the year (The trip to Asia slammed my budget, I have two more big trips planned, but there are no regrets on that account)
4. Read at least 10 more of the 100 best English-language novels of the 20th century (only 31 to go)
5. Rearrange my work schedule to go to the gym in the morning before arriving in the office
6. Spend more time with cherished friends and make the effort to cultivate new friendships
7. Have at least two fully planned and executed parties for friends and family
8. Plan "Glenn days" for body and soul replenishment
9. Say "I love you" more often - but only when I mean it

It is going to be a busy year! Stay tuned.

Here's to wishing you all a very happy, healthy, and prosperous 2012.
Much love,
Glenn

Seen and Heard

I am a "fur is dead" kinda guy, but this specimen sure did catch my eye in the Helping Hand Mission Thrift Store display window.

Cold weather is sure to be just around the corner and nothing keeps you warmer than a gently used fur coat. And, I bet a coat made from the fur of multiple animals would be even warmer cause this jacket is smoking hot!

My birthday is just a few days away.  Just saying.....

Decompression Dinner Party

The horror - oh the horror of waking up after hosting a holiday party. The memories of what was said and done under the influence of freely flowing alcoholic beverages can make the strongest man hang his head in shame. The consequences of decisions that seemed like such good ideas in the evening's glamor all seem so bad in the harsh light of day. And, don't forget the hangover - we have all been there and somehow survived to tell the story.

Since I was unable to get myself together for a real holiday party this year, I invited a few friends over last night for a small dinner party to decompress from the holiday season. So yesterday was spent in a frenzy of party preparation - house cleaning, food, house cleaning again, setting up the bar, trying out the signature cocktails to perfect the recipes, creating a mood with proper lighting, and setting the table with appetizers.

My guests arrived punctually at 6:30 for the cocktail hour. The evening's signature drinks were well received, and the bottle of whiskey ran out at just the right time to keep the party moving along. The main course was placed in the oven and the wine selections were opened to air. Conversation flowed nicely. The playlist I created Tuesday morning was just upbeat enough to keep everyone circulating while I broke down the bar and got set up for dinner service. Dinner was followed by cordials and a universally loathed game that, based on the amount of laughter and shouting, was a hit. Since most everyone had to work Wednesday morning, the party broke up around midnight. Everyone was sent home with gift bags of my world famous pimento cheese spread, a bottle of champagne, and a big hug. Good times....

I do love throwing a party - especially when everything comes together for a memorable night. And this morning, in the harsh light of day, other than a few sticky spots on the floor and a full recycling bin, the house is in remarkably good shape. The host on the other hand is slightly hungover and may need a new pair of shoes or some other retail therapy after he finishes with the mop.

The party details:
Guests: Clodagh and Jerry B., Cathy and Arjay H., Janice M. and Greg P., Lowell M., and the Host.
Signature Cocktails for the Evening: Old Fashioneds and Manhattans
Appetizers: Chicken Salad, Deviled Eggs, Pimento Cheese, Sausage and Cheese Balls, Veggies and Dip.
Dinner: White Spinach Lasagna with Marinara Sauce and Fresh Tomato Bruchetta
Wine: A selection of Malbec, Cabernet Sauvignon, and Chianti (with Champagne to end the evening)
After Dinner Cordial: Lemoncello
Universally Loathed Game: Celebrity Taboo

I wish I could have invited everyone in the neighborhood, but I have such limited seating for dinner that there will necessarily have to be a phase two party to be planned in the spring. I am thinking something involving mojitos and less sit-down style food. Stay tuned...

A Christmas Wish for 2011

When I look back at the Christmas holidays I have experienced - I see a progression from childhood excitement, to teenage apathy, to young adult enthusiasm, through to my current midlife contentment. I did not grow up in a particularly religious home. My parents had devout mothers, but other than a brief flirtation at church membership, the habit of organized religion just never took root in their hearts. As such, in our home, Christmas was a secular, American celebration complete with trees, decorations, cooking, baking, and an abundance of gifts from Santa.

In my post-Santa adulthood, the holidays have come to be a time to reconnect with family that I see only occasionally. And, more recently the holidays have become a time to share food and drink with dear friends, a time to reach out to friends in far away places, and a time to remember those no longer among us who made the holidays memorable with their smiles and their love. And, I have to admit, even today as I cling to the last days of my 48th year, when I drive by a home that brightens the night with twinkling lights and decorations, both tacky and tasteful, I flash back to that excited Christmas morning feeling of eager anticipation. There is something special about this time of year, even for we secular deists.

So, no matter how you choose to celebrate, whether with the family into which you were born or the family you have created for yourself along the way, I wish you and yours a very merry Christmas, a happy Hanukkah, a wonderful winter solstice, a satiating Saturnalia, and a very happy new year. Regardless of your tradition, make it memorable because in the end, our memories are all we get to take with us.

Peace and Love
Glenn

Big Shiny Christmas Balls

He sees you when you're sleeping....

I have not been really feeling the Christmas spirit this year. With my recent travels, the changes at work, and my recent back issues, I have been more self absorbed than usual.  Perhaps self-absorption is my new normal - I seem to be writing that quite a bit lately. 


With that said, my BFF from Ft. Lauderdale stopped by Wednesday to kick off his holiday family tour of Eastern NC. Luckily he arrived early and we were able to spend the entire evening catching up, talking about our holiday plans, our families, and planning our next trip in February (Caribbean Cruise). Although I could not tempt him with a few shots of tequila to get the evening started, we had a great time nonetheless. He can always make me laugh and I am so excited that his career choice is really paying off for him lately.

Around 7:30 we headed over to 18 Seaboard for an early birthday celebration dinner. This restaurant is a hidden jewel in downtown Raleigh. All menu items are sourced locally, the food is always amazingly tasty, and the service is spot on. We started with Fried Green Tomatoes and She-Crab Soup, followed by Crackling Pork Hamhock over spinach and bleu cheese grits / Fried Catfish over a smoked hominy cake with bacon braised collards - all topped off with a dessert of Carmelized Apple Toffee Pudding. Yum. I was beginning to feel a little more of the holiday spirit.

No tree this year - just a theme of hanging balls....

We followed this up with a quick stop at Flex where we downed a couple of beers and played our favorite video game - we registered the top three scores! We were home by 10:00. While watching Top Chef I had an epiphany - when I win the lottery, I think I would really like to go to chef school. I do love to eat food and I quite enjoy cooking it as well. Mind you, I am not interested in working in a restaurant (again) or opening my own place, just learning more about the science of good cooking. Then perhaps a bit of traveling to learn more about food from various regions. It's a dream, but where would we be without our dreams? 

Just before bedtime, there was a sound as if something had fallen. A quick scan downstairs did not immediately reveal anything amiss, so I did not think anything more of it. We settled into our respective beds, with our favorite bedtime television shows lulling us to sleep.  Cocktails + Delicious Meal + Beers = Sweet Dreams!

Low Hanging Holiday Balls - Don't be Jealous

John had an early appointment in Wilmington Thursday morning so we were up early for coffee and the shower tag team. As he was heading out with his luggage, he nearly tripped on one of the shiny holiday balls that adorn my door.  We were now sure that the sound we heard the night before was due to the ball falling and bouncing into the hallway; however, we were not sure what caused the ball's detachment. John suggested that perhaps a neighbor was jealous of my huge, shiny, holiday balls and exacted their revenge. It is more likely that after a few years of being admired and rubbed by all the neighbors, that one of the ties simply came loose. No matter the reason, I spent my lunch hour performing a ball reattachment procedure. After a good polishing, my door once again sports the biggest holiday balls in the building.



I wish you all a happy continuation of Hanukkah.
Happy Festivus (feats of strength and the airing of grievances will soon follow)
Happy Holidays!

Thank you Again Internet

The internet is the gift that keeps on giving.  How can anyone ever get bored when news items from around the world simply pour into your news feed? Today, this gem from Charleston, SC was posted by a friend on Facebook: Man Eats Cocaine From Brother's Butt, Dies.

Comments anyone?  Anyone? This is definitely fodder for a classic lunch table discussion.  I can only imagine the direction the conversation would take: I mean, I love my brother, but would I eat something out of his butt? Not on purpose and only to save his life. My brother loves me, could I convince him to eat something still warm from my butt? Extremely unlikely. I can't even imagine the conversation that lead up to the reveal and the meal. Perhaps it was something like: Open your mouth and close your eyes and you will get a big surprise.

Other questions that come to mind: How high was the eater before he consumed an ounce of cocaine lovingly warmed to 98.6F (37C)? Was the first brother handcuffed as he fished out the baggie and fed it to his brother? Were there skid marks visible on the baggie? Did he chew, or just swallow? Was it actually all up inside there and had to be squeezed out, or simply nestled lovingly between the butt cheeks? Was this the only thing he had up there, or were there other delightful treats? What did he have in his pockets that was so important that he had to use the final frontier as a storage area?

Other comments for which I cannot take credit:

• Rectum?  I killed him.  (Facebook favorite)
• Next time, don't use the store brand baggies. (Amanda L.)
• Survival of the fittest, proven yet again. (Facebook)
• Crack does indeed kill.

Once again, my deepest sympathies to the family for their loss. But really, it was only a matter of time.

Leave a comment below to become part of the conversation.

Instant Karma - Just Add Water...

Recently my company changed our vacation policy to include both vacation time and sick time.  Vacation time can be carried over at the end of the year, but sick time cannot. Since I had several sick days still in the bank, I decided to play hookie from work and have a long weekend of constructive boredom to prepare for the holidays. I used my reoccurring lower back pain as an excuse for not coming into the office that Friday. I was quite busy the entire weekend and enjoyed my time off so much that I decided to use another day on Monday to round it all out.

Karma started catching up with me that very day. There was an issue that arose at work requiring me to work for about five hours that afternoon - so I really had very little time off. She completed the job this past weekend.

After having a lovely Friday evening shopping with my niece (happy 15th birthday!), I woke up early Saturday morning, got the house cleaned and the laundry done, ran some errands and made plans to meet friends out for a holiday drink. Around 5 PM a nagging pain started in my lower back, so I retired to the sofa.  By 9:00 PM there were shooting pains from my back through my glutes and into my upper thighs. Needless to say, I had to cancel my plans with Alex and Joe, take a few pills, and stretch out in bed (apologies are due to Alex, who has been quite vigilant in trying to set up a time to celebrate the holidays).

I hoped the pain would soon pass, but unfortunately I was incapacitated all day on Sunday. I did get to do a bit of reading, napping (thank you pain medication), and catching up on some movies (Green Zone and Toy Story). However on Monday, the pain was still around. Due to overwhelming feelings of guilt and continuing fear of karmic retribution, I trudged into work with my heating pad and bottle of Aleve.

Today, things are returning to normal. To make the day even brighter, my friend John is flying into Raleigh for a night on the town before he heads home to spend time with his family. I am guessing that I may not be fresh as a daisy in the morning, but tonight, I will allow the Christmas spirits to do their work. There is a new tequila bar that recently opened in my building - could be trouble...

Happy Hanukkah to my Jewish friends. It is truly a season of miracles.
Happy Winter Solstice to my Naturist / Humanist friends. It is the longest night of the year - don't let it go uncelebrated.
Happy Saturnalia to the rest of you - you know who you are....